The Gift to Myself


It is Time.

As part of the writing for my forthcoming book “Grieving Parents – Surviving Loss As A Couple” I have been conducting many interviews with other bereaved parents. I have spoken to fathers and mothers in various relationship structures at the time and following their loss.

I have been giving a Gift to Myself. Let me tell you how:

Communicating with these beautiful parents I noticed the way in which my whole body relaxed. Reflecting on their experience, opening into their emotions and truly being present to them allowed me to realise those aspect of my journey that somehow resonated. Even though the stories might not have been similar, there was a recognition on another level. My neurology settled and calmed down. Thoughts like “Ok, so that’s normal” or “Me too” or simply nodding my head in agreement where signs of recognition.

Recently I have been re-listening to those interviews and even though I knew their story, I noticed this calming effect again.

That wasn’t exactly my story but there is so much I can relate to.

– Sean Hanish

Speaking to Sean Hanish, director and producer of the first feature film on Stillbirth “Return To Zero” he expressed the exact same experience while talking to people he recently met on the premiere of his film. Carrie and Jonathan Fisher-Pascual confirmed this from their work with bereaved parents for their Project STILL.

Isn’t it time to stop thinking of bereaved parents as a bunch of sad people and learn how to be emphatic with them, with us? Start with yourself, if you are a bereaved parent and connect, communicate with others who understand and together let’s tell the world.



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