So many chances of meetings are realized since I have stopped listening to thoughts like: ‘you can’t ask that!’ or ‘don’t be so nosy!’.
Just yesterday I had a wonderful experience that only occurred because I followed my intuition to ask the ‘unasked questions’.
I have previously met this woman who has lost one of her twins 21 years ago. I would have to say that I don’t know her that well, at least in terms of ‘time spent together’, but we share a common experience. Yesterday, while spending time together, we were talking about ‘other things’ when, totally out of context of our conversation, I became aware of the absence of our common element and I ‘saw’ her daughter next to her. I can’t say I know her daughter, let alone have ever seen a picture so when I say ‘I saw her’ what I mean is that I suddenly had this sense that she’s there and I was led to ask: ‘So when were your twins born?’ and ‘When was it that your boy died?’
I don’t believe in coincidences however I am still in awe of the synchronicities that unfold as I’m trusting. She answered with a smile: ‘It’s 21 years today.’ A beautiful conversation unfolded about the rituals we engage in around our children on earth and those in the spirit world. Realizing that I do not have a grave to tend to and that the place where we scattered Amya’s ashes are 16’500 km away from where I am I had tears in my eyes. Yes, I know, I have Amya with me in my heart at all times. Still, I’m open to meet the sadness wherever it comes up.
I look at this woman as a beacon of light, a possible future experience of me as a mother dealing and having dealt with the loss of her precious child. And yet again I’m reminded that each and everyone’s experience is personal and individual. Some mothers might still be crying every day after 21 years and others might not. It’s less about doing well equals ‘not crying’ and more about meeting yourself in and on your journey, every day.
One would say ‘it’s a sad thing to have in common to have lost one of your twins’ but what I learn from this woman every time we meet is to always be open to the gift of what is, what has been, what no longer is and what is instead…